Saturday, November 7, 2015

Five Years

My head is spinning and my heart is aching. Tomorrow will be five years since Julia was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. That's not the hard part.  The part that is getting to me is that from tomorrow forward, she will have lived longer with diabetes than she lived without diabetes.

It feels like yesterday, taking her to the doctor, driving to the emergency room.  I can still remember every moment. It also feels like so long ago.  We have come so far. I remember when we left the hospital I was so scared. Scared that I would mess up. Scared of her getting sick. Scared of ever letting her out of my sight. And yes I have messed up, I am human after all.  She has gotten sick but we survived. And I do let her out of my sight but with our Dexcom with share, I always know how she is doing.

I am so proud of her. She is so strong. She is wise beyond her years. She has empathy for others and is so responsible. Five years ago I had no idea the amazing young lady she would become.  I just knew my sweet little kindergarten girl's life would never be the same. It hurt then and that still hurts now.

I've known this anniversary was coming. It has been weighing on my heart for a while now. She mentioned it at dinner last night. It was just a casual comment.  "Sunday is my five year diaversary." No big deal. She wants to go to Benihana or out for sushi on Tuesday to commemorate it.  So we will. We will go out and celebrate her strength and her future.  I will borrow a little bit of that strength. I will be okay because she is okay.

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